Not the Mr. and Mrs. that we used to be, but just two strangers with the same last name. Home Depressed Unhappy Wife Letter To Husband. I hope that one day you will be able to forgive me for the mistakes I have made during our years together as husband and wife. Every marriage encounters some bumps on the road, but the strong ones survive everything. Sometimes it takes every bit of motivation to get up in the morning, but Ineverlet you in on this. Our home has turned into a simple house and I want us to have a home again. Bonobology.com is the couple-relationship destination for Indians everywhere! And I need help. I had married a lover, not a detective who is out to sniff out mysteries all the time. I love you so much, and it hurts me to see you like this! She shared a copy with Joie Bose, who published it in on Bonobology. Privacy Check out ourSubmit a Storypage for more about our submission guidelines. I know youre busy with work, but can we please take some time for each other? I know that sounds selfish and maybe it is, but it doesnt change how I feel: that our family isnt complete because we arent all together as a family anymore. Forgetting the bread will not be the real reason. Marital tension has been related to an increase in the prevalence of mental health issues such as depression and alcoholism." I'm not happy. "@type": "Question", I should acknowledge I don't know the details. And that should be enough for you. You are trapped by your own thoughts and ideas about how things should be and what you want from life; and I am trapped by my own mind as well because even though I know that no one will ever understand me, including myself, I still try anyway. We were so happy back in college, when everything was new and exciting, when our future was bright with possibilities. Why is it that every man I talk to a prospective usurper of your seat? I have been a faithful wife to you for the past ten years, and I have tried to be a good mother to our children. This letter to a husband about feeling unwanted is my scream for your attention my pain finally put into words. You had wanted to see my call log. I need you to hold my hand and lead me to the future we planned for us. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Open Letter To The Man Who Stopped Loving Me, Heartbreaking Goodbye Letter To A Narcissist. Unhappy Marriage Letter | Talk About Marriage I know you went through your season of anxiety, and hear me out, I was happy when you did. If you love me with your heart, you will trust me. You need to show me love and affection if you want our marriage to last as long as we hoped for. Thank you so much for this! Well just keep drifting away from each other. Take some time out. First of all, Im sorry you have to read this letter about feeling unwanted and unloved, but that is how I feel lately. It feels like I need to scream to stop it, but instead, Im writing a letter to you, my dear husband, about feeling unwanted. We have 2 teenagers freshman and 8th grade and now our youngest. How to Discuss Your Depression with Your Partner 1. But it seems like you dont want that anymore it seems like you dont want me. You used to leave me little notes and kiss my forehead while Im asleep. } I cant just go on with my life without you, but I cant keep feeling so unloved either. We used to have our own love language that would melt my heart and make me dream of you. But now we dont have each other anymore, we just have this awkward silence between us thats killing me. And its not just because youve been there for me, but because I love you and want to be with you at any cost. -Kacey. She has a passion for writing and often refers to it as her therapy. As long as we had each other, there could be no obstacle too large. Depression Unhappy Wife Letter To Husband - Marriage Talk Thank you for understanding when I cant put a meal on the table and getting us takeout. I love you. It hurts so much when you ignore me like that like I dont matter as much as your work does. A year ago, our marriage was perfect. Male depression: Understanding the issues - Mayo Clinic But whatever the reason for my unhappiness, theres no denying that its real and that it mattersto me and to our marriage. Get your dose of relationship advice from Bonobology right in your inbox, Joie Bose is considered as one of the leading English poets of the city and writes Confessions with Joie Bose for Bonobology (when she is not working for a multinational company). And if that means ending our relationship so you can find happiness with someone else, then so be it. Various factors, including a loss of control and abuse in a marriage, can cause depression. You hardly ever spend time with me anymore and when we are together it is always work related conversations or about the kids, or about other peoples problems. We yell at each other and pretend that its about whatever trivial thing we are yelling about. If you feel better without me, my heart would be shattered, but Id be happy for you. It doesnt feel that way anymore, though, and its killing me. It shouldnt have got to this stage. I miss getting flowers and chocolate just because you wanted to surprise me. So, for as long as Im living and far after that, I will keep loving you and staying by your side. Take some time to think things through and have some space to really feel my absence. The following letter samples are compiled for a depressed, unhappy wife to help her describe her situation and express her innermost concealed emotions. I think Im going to have a panic attack. or Oh my gosh, Im so depressed became a monotonous phrase that strangers were all too happy to proclaim when the coffee shop ran out of their favorite muffin or they were forced to stay in the library a little later than normal to finish a paper instead of going to the bars with their friends. There are many ways by which a husband can deal with his wife without having to leave the marriage. Were your one-stop destination for unraveling the mystery that is love. Separation is not an option, if you ask me, but feeling alone in a marriage shouldnt be an option either. Follow us at: This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. The whole scene made me sad because it reminded me of how I used to treat my ex-wife. Now, we cant even bother to get angry at each other. I am writing this letter to you with a heavy heart. I think you already know this. I want to publicly thank you for loving me and supporting me. Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. But the truth is, Im not happy either, and that makes me feel like Im failing you as a wifeand as a person. Its been a long time since Ive felt like myself. Things have been difficult between us lately, but we can fix them if we try hard enough! Sometimes, you just have to write things down to really face the truth. At that time all I want you do to, is repeat the oath of forevermore to me. If it were anyone else, I still would have gotten my postpartum depression, but I definitely wouldnt have had the support you provided me with. I shouldnt feel unwanted by the man I planned to spend the rest of my life with. I know that we have had a rough patch lately, but I want us to move past it together. If you need support right now, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. I've never told you how cold it feels when you look at me like you're looking at a ghost. I dont feel like you want that future anymore. It may look funny from the beginning but the truth is that it helps in choosing your words right and gives you the greater space to express yourself well through words. This is a very poignant letter written by a wife to a husband, who is insecure, suspicious and has serious trust issues. I need to feel safe in your embrace like I used to. Does the designation of a husband come with this responsibility? "An unhappy marriage chronically feels bad. How you deserve better. Write a letter to anyone you wish had a better understanding of your experience with disability, disease or mental illness. } Therefore you should know them better as a husband and know when they need love and care. When we first met five years ago, I never thought I would be writing this. Youre happy when Im happy, and youre sad when Im sad. Im sorry you get thebrunt of my anger on cloudydays. Its like an old addiction that comes to hurt me when it smells the dark cloud. Thats the scary truth. The multiple days where you would stay in bed, or not shower, or the days where eating a meal seemed like too much work. Thank you for fulfilling my random cravings because you know it will make me feel better. I think its because your job is too stressful and youre taking it out on us by staying away. Since having our son (18 months) things changed, I knew they would but I never expected the jealousy my husband has now, the constant questioning my love for him, the secret conversations with other women, accusing me of doing the very things he is doing. You used to show me so much affection, but now I think my own husband is not attracted to me anymore. But please dont ever think that its because I dont think you and our son are worth living for. I know sometimes I say I wish I didnt exist. Marriage however becomes boring when these expectations arent met by one of the couples. To the contrary, you were always so bright and full of life and energy. I was at a party and I had a tiny crush on the married birthday girl, and I watched her husband ignore her all night (and already knew him to be a less-than-ideal partner). 2. (Insert husband's name or nickname here), I'm writing you this letter to express my feelings. When you go through depression while in a marriage, theres a high possibility that you feel unhappy in the marriage and even fall out of love depending on the intensity of the effects the depression may have caused on the marriage. I know that this letter may seem harsh and mean-spirited towards you but it is not intended that way at all! One of the things I care a lot about is humans. 2022 Mighty Proud Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. We dont laugh anymore. When we first met, I thought that was it: You were the one for me! And if we look at us, theres nothing to see but two strangers who are living under the same roof. Whod want to write a letter to a husband about feeling unwanted? As I lay here in bed with the baby, you're in the other room drinking a beer. I have everything I could need: a beautiful baby and a wonderful husband. Outline your objectives and intentions. Because were not love-struck teens anymore. Be a supportive husband. An Open Letter to My Spouse Struggling with Depression - Nashville Moms It would feel like having everything I could ever wish for and losing it all in a second. To the love of my love, I know our marriage hasn't been working the way we expected. Template: 3. When we got married, it was the happiest day of my life, to make my vows to you and promise to love you forever. I love you, and Ill never stop loving you, but it needs to go both ways. "acceptedAnswer": { You hardly ever ask how my day was or what was going on in my life anymore. I want us to be happy again please help me make this happen by making an effort with me! 3. Did you ever once think about it? I know that things havent been perfect lately but that doesnt mean they cant get better again someday either! Oops! Even if you dont want me anymore, I want you to want me. Why are you so insecure of my love for you? Sometimes Ill tell you. until the birth of our beautiful baby boy. After all weve been through, I think it does and Ive started feeling like its not an option youd consider anymore. But if you dont want me anymore and dont want to fix things, take a break. I love you, and I know you love me too. We both know were not the same people we were when we first met, but does it have to mean that were not a married couple? 2022. Depression clouds your mind. Click here to learn more. Now that I know what I would miss, Im here to stay. I know you must be wondering why Im writing this letter. Dont doubt me, dear. But I need you to understand that I also need your support right now. As a wife who is going through depression, my advice for you is that you also communicate your thoughts and feelings to your partner as that helps you to recover and also sustains your relationship. Minimizing each other's feelings, having little sex, feeling abandoned and powerless, and no longer having fun together all indicate an unhappy marriage . Words that seem like bullets. You never have time for me anymore, and I dont know if that will ever change. If you are so suspicious of me all the time how will we ever have a happy relationship? And its from inside that tower I fight and say mean words that feel like stones being pelted at you. 5 Reasons And 6 Helping Tips, Fighting In A Marriage 10 Tips To Do It Right, 9 Sure Signs Your Wife Is Changing Her Mind About Divorce, 15 Warning Signs Your Partner Is Losing Interest In The Relationship, What To Do When Your Husband Defends Another Woman? Writing a letter to your husband about how depressed you are and how you feel can feel weird especially if it is your first time and the fact that it has to come in a letter form. It appears you entered an invalid email. But I have to tell you the truth about how I feel. In a word, I felt helpless. I firmly believed there was nothing I could do. Have difficulty sleeping or sleep too much. Thank you for that. If so, please forgive me and know that I want to make it up to you. When I share those dark thoughts with you, it saddens you to know I hurt. I am writing to you in the hope that you will understand the situation and get back to me. You used to care for me. A fight and make up will never take that away. But know that this time this time I will be ready. How Do I Write A Letter To My Husband About My Feelings? I used to be so happy when we were first married but now everything has changed and it feels like we are just roommates living under the same roof instead of husband and wife who should love each other unconditionally no matter what happens! Mum with depression pens heartfelt letter to husband Instead, I dont even feel loved by you. You didnt have to marry me. Communication can break or build up a relationship. I didnt lie. All Rights Reserved. No matter how much confusion and pain we're . I have been feeling very depressed lately. Depressed Unhappy Wife Letter To Husband - Sfalettermen I am writing this to you with tears in my eyes and desperation in my heart. We even used to have a rule about not going to bed angry. Please dont ask me if ImOK my automatic answer will beyes. Think. One brave woman recently reached out to her husband with an open letter to open up about what she called a "killer" illness. Related Reading: 5 Unbelievably Weird Reasons Cited by Indians for Divorce. Depression is one thing that can cause a couple to become unhappy in marriage. An Open Letter to My Spouse Struggling with Depression. My life wouldnt be the same without you in it and I dont even want to imagine it. Rehab is another alternative place to deal with depression. I have learned that there will always be days when you are down. If we carry on like this, we wont accomplish anything. I love to see them happy always, Here Is Your Favorite Way To Orgasm, Based On Your Zodiac Sign, What Your Zodiac Sign Says About The Type Of Orgasm You Normally Experience, Improve Your Health And Well-Being With The Dr. Sebi Diet Plan, Unleash the Power of Plant-Based Healing with Dr. Sebis Cell Food, The Top Dr. Sebi Approved Herbs for Optimal Health and Vitality. I wonder why the love has started diminishing. On weekends, all we do is sit around watching TV together as a family when we should be doing something fun together as a family instead of just sitting around like zombies! 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Writing about your feelings can be beneficial in helping you understand your emotions and may help you discover other ways to express yourself to those you love. To the Husband With the Wife Who Has Depression - The Mighty I have been living in this world for 28 years but never knew what it feels like to be so depressed and unhappy. In as much as there should be fun, one should note that marriage goes beyond having fun. We hardly ever talk anymore, except when were fighting or yelling at each other (which is often). Required fields are marked *, I felt like I was reading my own words. Rehab center, also known as rehabilitation is a drug addiction treatment to provide and give support and care to people who have problem with drug addiction, and depression and finds it difficult to put a stop to it. Thank you for that. When you reached your lowest low, it was difficult for me to not take personally your statements asking me to simply let you be and that you needed to work through it on your own. I wanted to express how much I adore and care about you. Ive spent so many nights crying myself to sleep thinking about what we could have been if only we had made different choices along the way. Im not a thief. And although society says it's what you should do to unwind, I've grown to loathe that can. It's part of my brain chemistry, my DNA, along with a thousand other things about me that you love or that frustrate you. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. I miss the bond we used to have, and I hope that you miss it enough to try to create it again. I dont know where to start but it all started when we moved here. The symptoms of depression and unhappiness can vary widely, but may include: If you or your wife are experiencing any of these symptoms, it is important to seek professional help. I am writing this letter to you because I need to tell you how I feel. It was a game we were playing. I cannot go on living like this anymore. When we married, we promised each other that we would be there for each other no matter what happened, but lately you have been absent more often than not. Just be sure to choose your words right and you are good to go. If for any reason you are not able to perform it, it can bring misunderstanding leading to a lack of interest in the relationship. Writing a letter in itself can be stressful as you challenge yourself on how the introduction should look and how the body should be. And Ive left my identity to become your wife. I wanted so badly for things to work out between us, but it hasnt happened yet. Sample letter to your husband about being unhappy As we stood on stage in front of all of those strangers, acting our hearts out, I never once believed we would find ourselves here. I dont have to clear every misunderstanding that you might harbour. To the spouse who wants out . I felt trapped in a cycle of trying to understand your depression, to getting frustrated when it got too bad, and finally returning to wanting nothing more but to help you feel better. If you truly dont want me and dont love me anymore, dont let me stop you. I am writing this letter to you because I dont know what to do. I think about it a lot, though how you might be better off with someone else. I know how much you love me and how much you want me to be happy. A Letter To My Husband About Feeling Unwanted And Unloved - Think aloud I try to hide it from you because I dont want to worry you, but its been getting harder and harder to keep up the faade. I love our children more than anything, but sometimes I feel like a failure. I hope you know I try. I loved you as soon as I saw you and knew we were meant to be. This can be made very simple. I feel very guilty about all the pain that I have caused you and our children, but please understand that this guilt is only making me feel even more depressed and unhappy than before. I'm not sure how I should be feeling about the things said between me and my husband. Theres so much more ahead of us that we need to face together. I am sorry that I couldnt keep my promise of being your wife who will always be there for you. In the course of helping a depressed wife, you may want to introduce them to a support group if it goes beyond you. Something has to change. We know when one of us needs space, and we know when one of us needs that extra loving. We dont even want to sleep in the same bed. Do you know why I didnt show? Every time I was down, youd pick me up and comfort me like no one else can do better than you do. I have tried to talk about this with you but you are always busy at work or playing golf with your friends. After all, youre all that I have, and all that truly matters to me. I wont stop you, but know that I wont give up on us as long as theres hope. Related Reading: Confession of an insecure wife Every night after he sleeps, I check his messages. Bring Resources to the Table. Id lock the memory of you in there for all eternity and let no one come as close to me as you did. I wanted to express how much I adore and care about you. And I keep that hurt in my heart. All those pieces coming together the texts, the absences on an affair. I want things to get better, i want to be your wife and your friend and I want to feel like I'm as important as everything else in your . When we first met, Id never beentruly close to a person whosuffered from long-term anxiety and severe depression. It feels like were just going through the motions of life together without really connecting on any level anymore. Let us do away with these trivial marriage issues. Heres my letter: Please understand I do love you, as i write this i feel relief and sadness. My dear husband, I know you will be surprised to read this letter. ", Our love will always be my favorite melody, but it takes two to tango. It likely involves a number of factors, including brain chemistry, hormones and life experiences. I know that no one can take away all the happiness from your life except yourself but please stop blaming me for everything that goes wrong between us because I dont want any more fights or arguments between us anymore! Not to see you suffer or walk through my shoes, but to have a chance to show you that I will always be there for you, too. So long as we can do it together. I havent self harmed since February 2010, but the urge often consumes me. I want you to choose to stay and fight for what we have, but if its too late, go. I would have never met you or had our child, but I also wouldnt have known what I was missing. You mean the world to me and I know its not your fault. I have been trying hard not to show you my tears, but now I cant hold them back anymore. If you think you cannot express your feelings to your husband directly it is best to express yourself in a letter which allows you to express yourself better by choosing your ideas carefully. I'm stuck in an unhappy marriage | Relate I want you to know and remember my unconditional love for you. You go straight to bed after dinner without even saying goodnight to me or the kids. A Letter from a Wife to a Husband That Shocked Him to Tears "@type": "Question", I no longer feel your love for me and I miss your tender touch. }. I cant save our marriage if youre not going to fight for it too. Depression is very clever, you see it builds up a wall of anger piece by piece, and you never notice it until its so big it begins to topple over. For a realm where there are no tears for me. | You can also request feedback in the conclusion. You have been working so hard lately, and it seems like you never have time for me anymore. I was ready to give in to whatever you wanted, even if those tendencies were reckless or self-destructive. This world has become too painful for me, and all I can think of is ending it all and leaving behind the pain and suffering so that our kids can be happy again without having to worry about their crazy-depressed mommy anymore. I didnt show. "We have been married five years, but have no children, only a handsome home. I know it can add up quickly. And when you view me like that all the time, it hurts me so much. But Im not guilty of adultery. I was giving myself forever to my best friend, soulmate, lover, the other half that made me complete. Depression is vile a vile, nasty monster. We used to talk about our days when you came home from work, but now all you want to do is relax, watch TV or go to sleep. Related Reading: How jealousy killed the love which no conspiracy or distance could. You say that you love me but you never show it. And if it ever comes back, I want you to know Ill be here again and again. You wanted me as your punching bag. Thank You much Love , Yeboah Lucy Mawunyo Abla is my name. I was right. You know how I may struggle with words when it comes to emotions, so I thought I'd offer you something physical to express how I've been feeling. Causes of Depression and Unhappiness in Wives, Symptoms of Depression and Unhappiness in Wives. Instead of cuddling and watching a movie, we create real-life drama. When we first met, I thought you were different. I feel so lonely and sad all the time. No one would choose to feel this way, I promise you. Whats tearing us apart, making us seem so far away from each other even on those rare occasions when we hug? One day I hope it wont ever cross my mind again. Writing A Letter About Your Depression | Psych Central 2022 Mighty Proud Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Dont ever doubt my love. I know that no one can ever take your place in my life. Im depressed and obviously unhappy. It will hurt like hell to watch you leave, but I dont ever want to force you to give me the love I deserve. You can find even more stories on our Home page. I never saw this monotony in you. I know my depression can seem selfish. There, youll also find thoughts and questions by our community.